Marvelous Wonders of the Chinese People

Chinese are NOT the same as Americans. No matter what you say, I shall not believe you. First of all, in generally, I am beginning to think that Chinese are more well-balanced than Americans. This may or may not have something to do with all that crazy yin-yang stuff, but personally I think the issue goes much deeper into Chinese culture than that.
Take for instance how they ride bikes. I have seen more contortions of the human body than I ever imagined possible in an effort to fit multiple bodies on one bike. Generally there will be the one guy who is riding the bike (i.e. riding it like you would expect someone to ride a bike), in addition to this adventurous fellow there are usually two or three more people perched on the various pieces of bike which are not yet occupied. Favorite positions include: standing on the mud flap above the back tire, standing on either one of the pedals (this style can only be utilized going down hill), sitting on the handlebars between the first guy's arms, or crouching with one foot on the back end of the seat which is not covered by the first guy's posterior. Now I would be willing to wager most Americans simply incapable of this sort of action. We don't have the balance. When things really interesting though is when you see this sort of behavior on motorcycles and or cars. I am afraid that while I applaud the courage of these individuals, I also make somewhat scandalous judgments about their intelligence.
But the Chinese excellence of balance is only one of the many marvels of this people. In addition, we may also discuss that particularly intriguing aspect of the Chinese working-man's culture. If you spend much time in China at all, you should quickly notice that there are many people doing manual labor who should not be. Of course, if you spend more time in China you will quickly realize that these people actually should be doing manual labor and are only dressing like they shouldn't. Chinese manual labor fashion includes the following: for the male, he often wears a suit, usually of gray or dark blue pinstripe, most likely wool, often with two buttons and never more than three. Some of the more enterprising workers can be seen in double-breasted suits, with the occasional bow tie. For the female, working dress includes pretty much the exact same thing (afterall we must remember, China is a liberated communist county which does not acknowledge the difference between man and woman). I, who am normally a bad dresser in the relaxed environment of Washington, have been put to shame here. My flip-flops and Bellingham Park's and Rec. Department T-shirts do not stand up to the clothing of the most menial of laborers. Humbling indeed.
And finally we have one more wonderful aspect of Chinese culture: lawncare. Since the first day I arrived in Kunming, I have been startled by the greenness of certain patches of grass in the city. For the most part Kunming is a dry city, especially since right now is the waning period of the dry season and it has been quite some time since it rained. However there are still patches of grass, especially at the universities, which are greener than Ireland. I, being the naturally bright thinker I am, assumed they used water. This was somewhat of an understatement.
Traditionally, watering the lawn takes place by hooking a hose up to a sprinkler and letting it rip. China has different views on the subject. It seems that the use of a sprinkler in the mechanical sense is not balanced enough for this culture. Instead they choose to hire middle-aged men, dressed to the nines of course in suits, who squat with a fire house and personally ensure the drowning death of every square foot of greenery. While this method does indeed achieve the desired affect of conveying H2O to the roots of a plant, it goes somewhat beyond.
Considering though the long and venerable history of this nation, I would be the last one to accuse them of inefficiency.
As far as comments go, I am able once again to read my own thoughts since I figured out a way around the Great Firewall of China. So leave them in plenty you faithful few.
Phil.